Hey spanish speakers. please translate?

This whole conversation that the spanish is saying is exactly what the person before me says that it says but because of their bad grammar and second grade way of typing it can also be inferred as "I am spanish-speaking douchebag who has no idea how to take the time to type 'que' instead of 'q' and am so bored I must pick a fight and take forever jUst 2 tYpe LyK tHIs and mAkE U mAd b3cuZ i lYk 2 tHinK I aM sOOOO aweSUM"